And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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