Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
