Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
