i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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