I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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