your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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