I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
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