Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I look excited, but its just a facade.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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