I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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