I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
