since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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