so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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