She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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