I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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