this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
