I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
