we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Your cock deserves a montage
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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