I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Houston, we have a squirter
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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