I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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