So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
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