im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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