just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
