names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
