my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
