You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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