i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
