great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
