Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Randomize
