mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
