How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
