I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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