I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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