His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
This is my gift to your gina
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
