Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
