i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize