they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize