my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
