we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
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