I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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