that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
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the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
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I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
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