He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
