shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize