who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
