I didn't shave. On purpose
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
