...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
She needs sedatives and a leash
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
