Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
