I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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