this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
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