and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
