After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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